BEST PICKUP STRATEGIES EVER

Touch Her, Then Stop

Still not sure if she\'s interested? If you\'ve made it to a second round of drinks, initiate contact by touching her arm several times during the next 15 minutes. Then abruptly stop all physical contact. If she\'s attracted to you, she\'ll fire a few strokes your way as soon as she realizes you\'ve stopped touching her. Touch is a very important part of courtship. If she touches you back, it\'s a good sign.



Approach the Amazon

Don\'t know how to break the ice with that gym babe? Ask her to show you how to do a particular exercise or operate a certain machine. She\'ll be flattered.



Deliver the Perfect Compliment

\"You\'re beautiful\" isn\'t a compliment. \"Nice set of helmets\" isn\'t a compliment. Compliment her on what she\'s made, not on what God\'s made. \"Lovely dress,\" \"Terrific memo,\" \"Incredible insight,\" \"Great joke!\" And don\'t overdo it. Once is enough. Every compliment after the first one takes away half the value of its predecessor.



Bring a Fake Date

If you have a great-looking female friend, by all means show her off. There are few things more attractive to a woman than the fact that other women are attracted to you. In a study, when people were asked to judge men based on photographs of them with \"spouses\" of differing attractiveness, unattractive men paired with good-looking women were routinely rated most favorably in terms of status.



Find Women with Jobs

To locate a high proportion of good-looking (if somewhat bitter and humorless) women, eat and drink in the area surrounding the courthouse. Law offices harbor an astonishing number of female lawyers, paralegals, and legal secretaries. All of \'em eat. Runner-up: hospital cafeterias. (Nurses. Lots of nurses.)



Guess Her Age

Have her punch her age into a calculator. Then have her multiply it by 7, then multiply that product by 1,443. Have her hand the calculator to you. Her age will be repeated three times. Watch: 28 (age) x 7 = 196; 196 x 1,443 = 282,828.





FUN WITH NUMBERS

Measure Your Penis

The best way to gauge penis size is to measure yourself as a urologist would.



Flaccid length: Measure immediately after undressing, since a cold or warm room can cause shrinkage or expansion. Do it while standing, and use a flexible ruler. Position the tip of the ruler gently against the point where the shaft meets your abdomen. Then bend the ruler along the shaft and read the length.

Average: 3.43 inches



Erect length: Immediately after you become fully hard, measure along the top of your erection from the base of the shaft to the tip.

Average: 5.03 inches



Girth: While still erect, wrap a cloth tape measure around your penis at its base.

Average: 5.14 inches around; 1.67 inches in diameter



Erection angle: Stand with your back against a wall and estimate your angle. A 0-degree erection (an oxymoron if we\'ve ever heard one) would point at your feet; 90 degrees would point out in front; and 180 degrees would aim at your chin.

Average: 105.7 degrees.